Friday, September 23, 2005

Got Change For $50???

I need 25 dollars
but all i got is fifty
all i got is a fifty???
all i have is too much
when all i need is just a little something
to get my by...
nah, to make me content...
no.
To fill a void?
Hardly...okay sometimes yea.
But I'm looking for just enough...more than enough...
forget it, let's bring it back...
I'm looking for just a little something:
to make me smile without force - friction or otherwise
to make me smell a rose - despite my acute sinus problems
to make me think smelling a rose is not absolutely the gayest thing in the world - despite the fact that I think everything is homo
to make me laugh - at something genuinely funny not sarcatic or insulting, but funny
to make me love
- with friction or otherwise
- despite my acute sinus problems
- despite the fact that I think everything is homo
- someone genuinely funny not sarcastic or insulting, but funny.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Red-Yellow-Blue

colorblind
but I see the darkness
clearly.
it consumes
assuming itself
to my right eye
numbing my left hemisphere
blank
my mind draws a blank
my mind draws black
ten times the intesity of india black
my mind draws a blank
striving to fill in the negative space
my mind draws black
I blackout.

Sunday, September 18, 2005

community garden

starting over
the withered petals of my flower
melt into the ground
surrounding my new seed
my seed
my seed of hope
of light
of life
for life i promise
to care
to come to its aid with fresh water followed by a little pint of love
to care
to leave it alone, to let it stand on its own -- another pint of love
starting over
knowing nature can not be altered
but nutured-
but cared for-
but loved unintentionally - accidentily - purposefully!!?! - loved
for what love is
for what we've made it
for what it has made us
a beautiful garden
greater then that of eden
a creation of nature and nurture

Monday, September 12, 2005

Trans-fat

like
butter
melting
down
my right thigh
slow
and hesitant
the butter
so disinclined
to let me go
leaves
a thick trail
on my body
now coated
with his love
his warmth
his butter
he's butter
he is butter
...I don't think I'll ever wash my thigh again.

*My cousin said his teacher said that your body never rids itself of the transfat ingested!!?!...I know who really cares...but then again we should huh. But yea I don't even know if butter has transfat...but again who cares...I'm done.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

It's Surely Not that Burning/Itching Sensation...I think...

It's hard to see the surface ain't it
when you're drowning
being pulled, pushed and coerced
into some oasis of a sea
a great mirage of a shark infested sea
so real so unimanginable
too true to be good
that you could feel your lungs filling with water
but its all just air
intangible
hardly seeable...
air
with the ability to torment
in its nothingness
it is...
it is doing nothing
yet right now
sniff sniff*
i smell it - i see it - i hear it - dammit i swear i taste it
but i just can't touch it
i can't hold on
i can't gently grab it by its hand to show that i care
i want it with me
whether to tease me
or excuse the rhyme...please me
i want it with me
i want you with me.

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Sleeping with My Eyes Wide Open

surrounded by everything unfamiliar
uncomforting
un...surreal
i drift
...much like i usually do every 10 minutes
but this time
i've led my subconscious to some sort of dead end
full of unanswered questions
or is this some sort of sanctuary of answers
where i am the only one without the right questions
consequently leading me back to my unrelenting conditional condition--
(...still thinking about this one)